Earlier today I wrote on my Facebook on what Love is. This was a caption from the definition taken from I Cor 13:1-4. What Love is not, would be relevant here especially today when the world celebrates or mark the Valentine day. Centered to my writing would be deduced from a caption from my earlier write up. And that is Love is not…. selfish or irritable.

Selfishness is not a virtue especially in loving relationship. When your fiance or fiancee is selfish and always seeks for his own thing, that is not love, watch it and be assured that you can tolerate it but don’t think you can change it.

yes valentine day centers the hearts of people of opposite sex on the word Love. Yes love that is pure is sacrificial. Today, in our church service a question was raised “What will somebody do to you that will mean that he/she loves you? Two words emerged these are ‘tolerate, and give.’ that reveals sacrifice.

My friend, love that makes demand of thing (s) you cherish most that you will not benefit from is not love, it is selfishness. Our perfect example of love is God, He gave for the benefit of the world that He loves.

Let no man deceive you into given off your virginity on the altar of love. Respect yourself and the gifts of God in your life. Reserve yourself for the man or woman you will marry and spend the rest of your life with.

King Solomon said it well when he says “Many waters cannot quench love, neither can the floods drown it: if a man would give all the substance of his house for love, it would utterly be contemned.” If that is true, anybody who loves you should be ready to wait until you say “I DO.” and though many waters cannot quench love, but selfishness, dishonesty or lack of transparency on the part of any of the spouses, will gradually and finally quench that love and affection between the two.

Selfishness manifests not only in the area of demand for sex. A married man or woman who is willing to get and get from the other person but selfish with his/her own things do not love enough. it is expected that the man owns the house especially in African settings. yet, many women sacrificially fund the home while some husbands hide under the norm. even in their poverty, some men fail to bless their wives rather they nag and sometime beat the wife with whip or verbal assaults.

Love is no longer blind or one – eyed. Open your eyes very well- physically ,emotionally, financially and spiritually before you fall in love so that you and your potentials are not buried long before you die.